I was on Facebook and surfing the Net yesterday and I was reading posts that I often subscribe to and some that I do not. I came across an article that really made me stop and think. What about? You're SO smart! Of Course, ‘Facebook and Friendship’. First I would like you to tell me How Many Friends Do You Have On Facebook? Do you have 1000? Do you have 2500? Do you have 250, 750, 300, or do you just have 22? Now ask yourself… what does that mean to me? Are you the kind of person that is always checking your friends ‘wall’ to see how many friends they have? Are you “friending” people just so you can say…? “ HA, HA, HA, …. I HAVE MORE FRIENDS THAN YOU DO! NAH, NAH, NA, NAH, NAAAH! J OR, are you like me and have very few friends on FACEBOOK. In and of it-self, the number you have, whether high or low is irrelevant. EVERY one of us is different and some of us are more naturally outgoing and have numerous relationships, yet others, have few and like it that way, we cherish that small number because we prefer small groups and more intimate relationships. (NO, I do not mean sexual) However, for the sake of the discussion here let me go on.
Personally, for me it is NOT about the NUMBER of friends I have, it is more about the quality of friends I have. And that is what I really want to get across to you today. There are so many of us who seem to be in a CONSTANT race or competition with one another to see who has MORE, who has the BEST or BETTER, etc. We need to stop and ask ourselves, are we often focused on the WRONG questions? We should be asking ourselves, MORE of WHAT? The BEST of WHAT? Really folks, what is a BEST friend? WHAT are you looking for in ‘Friendship’? Are the friends you have on FACEBOOK, truly FRIENDS? Do your friends meet the ‘Criteria’ as to what a ‘Friend’ truly should be?
For me, and I would hope with most adults, I look for qualities like, Trust, Loyalty, Kindness, Genuine, authenticity, and mutual investment. I want my friends to know that I not only have my own best interests at hand, but that I have theirs and hold theirs, in just the same way. I want to be the very best person I can be for myself so that I can share myself whole heatedly with them. Actually, I think that’s what Christ calls us to be as well. Let’s take a closer look at some attributes of Friendship. (I borrow these definitions, with slight alterations, from an article I read… see the bottom for links and info on the article I base this entire post on.
· Authenticity: Do you allow FRIENDS to know you Intimately? Do you Talk to them and share with them your true Self? No matter what, do THEY love you anyway? Or do you find yourself, hiding your real self from your FRIENDS because you fear or might be embarrassed about something. If, EITHER of you hurt one another… do you Forgive them or do you hold grudges for life!?
· Loyalty: Do you stand by your FRIEND? Do you keep your promises to HIM? Do you love HIM through thick and thin? Even if it’s not real convenient? Do you return to your FRIEND, love and kindness? Is your life Better for having HIM in it, and vic-versa?
· Equality: They say, “Genuine friends don’t keep Score.” When you ask a FRIEND or give a friend some help… do you Keep a score card, as to who owes the other how much? Do you give freely to your Friend? Does HE reciprocate the same? Is there a sense of mutual trust and equality in the relationship?
· Investment: Do we want the best for our FRIENDs and do you ‘invest’ in THEM, and put their needs before our own? Does your FRIEND do that for you? Do you act on HIS behalf to help him when he needs support and encouragement?
You know folks, if we are honest with ourselves each and every one of us, at one time or another fall short in our relationships. Even though we may have the best of intentions we still often fail one another. I guess that is what makes us Human and not Divine. But, that doesn’t mean that we should not strive to be the very best person for our OWN SAKE as well as for our FRIENDS. Here are some things we all need to strive for in our relations ships with FRIENDS, no matter how good and faithful they might be.
1. Have a meal with your FRIEND often.
2. Sit and spend some time with HIM or HER, with NO agenda. Just get together and hang out. Don’t forget to SHUT OFF the Cell, the Computer, and the TV. BE PRESENT to your friend, not just close by in your ‘own bubble’.
3. Apologize to HIM if you have done something to offend or hurt them; or if you fail to follow through on something you agreed to do.
4. Remind your FRIEND from time to time how much they mean to you and how important they are to be a part of your life.
5. Say thank you to your FRIENDS for all the ways they have touched your life.
6. MAKE plans with HIM, so you BOTH have something to look forward to.
So, when you go home and sign on to FACEBOOK today and find yet another person who wants to “FRIEND” you, GO AHEAD AND JUST DO IT! Then, make sure that you are the very best friend you can be. THAT is what you want from your FRIEND and you know I'm right! And, to all my FRIENDS -- we ALL know that GOD is looking for the same thing too..
END.
Thanks for reading my post…. But wait… don’t go just yet! READ ON.When I read this article I was really very very impressed and thought; this is the kind of thing that i could use for a 'teaching moment'. As a faith instructor with an RCIA group, in my church I could really use this in my class. But here is the twist. First, cut and paste this post to a ‘word’ document. Print copies for all your students. Read it in class with them, aloud. Now, you have just read my post and saw all the capitalized words… ‘FRIEND’, ‘HIM’ or ‘HER’ or ‘THEY’ that appear throughout the text. Now go back through and REPLACE each of those word with the word “GOD’ or a pronoun for Him. Print out the two sections that refer to the QUALITIES in a friend and the LIST of things to do with a friend to build that relationship. Make sure you replace all of the words ‘friend’ with ‘God’. You can even add more qualities and ideas of your own if you wish. Then, hand that out to your class. Now read it together, discuss it, and wrap up the lesson. WE all KNOW that God is our MODEL for RELATIONSHIPS. God who is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, is a GOD of relationships ... a community of relationships -- The Trinity is the best model for this. It is my hope and prayer that you share this with every teacher you know. The article entitled: “Would God ‘friend’ You?” posted by Jennifer Scroggins on Mar 30, 2011 on the St. Anthony Messenger Press web site is what gave me this idea. Please read her inspiring article here:
http://blog.americancatholic.org/2011/03/30/would-god-friend-you/
Until next time, May God Richly Bless you and yours.
Bill
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